My Story…
I’ve always been a highly sensitive empath. Actually, I believe we all are born this way. And like many of us, I had a knowing that I was here to help others to feel better. However, I misunderstood how to actually do that. As a little girl, I could sense the negative emotions around me and made it my “job” to “help” by absorbing these emotions from others. And it worked, THEY felt better.
Decades later, I learned that I wasn’t actually helping anyone by taking on others’ baggage. Plus, I had acquired some pretty significant physical conditions including severe IBS and migraines. I believe that a physical imbalance is derived from an emotional imbalance. The gut is where we physically digest our food and yes what we put into our body’s matters, but the gut is also where we digest our emotions. I had become full of emotions, and nothing was digesting properly anymore.
As a young introvert, I processed all the emotions I experienced through play but when that was lost to childhood, I not only lost my conduit for processing the excess energy but learned it wasn’t OK to express certain emotions.
Unexpressed emotions can become trapped in the body, these trapped emotions build up and can lead to physical, psychological, and emotional disturbances. Trapped emotions are also the building material for blocked hearts or heart walls. I had been hurt emotionally many times through my life and the unconscious part of me wanted to protect my heart from being hurt so she built a wall. This is a great defensive technique but unfortunately produces a less than full life. With a heart wall we aren’t able to fully feel or give love. Heart walls make us numb.
Numb is how I would describe my early adult years. I was going through the motions but not really living.
It wasn’t until my late 20s that I had my first awakening. My little boy came to me while I was in a ball of IBS pain and asked, “Are you sick again Mommy?” That was enough to wake me up and realize... I was sick all the time! What was wrong with me and why was this OK?
With each awakening I had, I noticed a process emerging. First the shock of the awareness comes. Second the denial and self criticism take over. And then you have a choice. Now that you know what you didn’t know before.. how do you want to live your life going forward?
And for me, I always choose change.
I chose to change my diet, my lifestyle, my career, my religion, my home, my parenting, my way of being. Awakenings are such blessings in our lives because they give us the opportunity to heal a part of ourselves. They always come at the perfect time – when we are ready for them. But even then, we get to choose.
I began meditating when I was 30. I remember how good it felt when I was finally able to reach the state of nothingness... It felt so good! Like I was high or something. It’s made a huge impact on my life and my healing. So much of my central nervous system was jacked up from years of abuse and trauma. Meditation helped me calm down and stay more grounded.
The more grounded I was, the more present I became and the more awareness I had. Through connecting more deeply with myself in this way, my intuition came back online, and I realized that my emotions were part of the complex language of my intuition. I was guided to make many leaps that I did with full faith.
Was it scary letting intuition lead the way? Yes… especially at first. For example, was it scary to leave my cushy corp gig and all the money and insurance it provided for me and my family? That’s a big leap when you don’t have any idea what you are going to do next. That’s how guidance works sometimes, the big picture is not revealed until later. I trusted that if I took the first step, I would be guided to the next one.
And I was…
As I taught classes on essential oils, I was devouring all things natural health related. I was creating a foundation. This hunger lead me to a certification as an integrated health coach, which turned me on to energy healing. I continue to be a student of life and am constantly learning new techniques, tools, and resources for healing the body, mind, and soul.
As I learned, I healed myself, I enthusiastically shared it with others and applied the same techniques to my children. I was having really profound results and powerful experiences combining physical healing with emotional and energetic healing. I became certified in the Emotion Code, Chakra Healing, and Akashic Record Reading.
With the assistance of these tools, I have been able to heal from a lifetime of verbal and emotional abuse, co-dependency, inner child wounds, worthiness, perfectionism, dissociation and more. I’ve strengthened my intuition, activated my sensuality (senses) and become more embodied.
For most of my life I’ve hated my body… not because of how it looked, but because of how it felt. This lifetime has been painful and I became very good at dissociating to escape from the physical and emotional pain that I endured. Much of my inner work has been centered around embodiment – bringing my soul back into my body and healing the relationship I have with my body.
I used to only feel the pain but now I GET to experience the pleasure, joy, and ecstacy that this life has to offer me. I have deep fullfilling relationships with myself and others and I know exactly who I am.
Throughout all the healing I’ve done, emotions have always been involved. Understanding and holding space for the spectrum of emotions that we get to experience on this earth is one of my gifts.
I believe that everyone can heal themselves and that the body can heal itself if given half a chance. With the mission to help others FEEL more fully alive, I teach what I’ve learned so that they can do it too. There are so many resources available to us on this journey and sometimes the best resource is another person who is able to hold space for you.
So many of us spend our lives afraid of feeling bad, but we forget that by doing this we are missing out on feeling amazing. This life is about polarity and fully living and FEELING all that life has to offer. That’s what I’m committed to.. . helping you feel all the amazingness life has to offer. I’m living my mission by helping you see yours. In whatever way we are meant to connect, I look forward to sharing space with you.